This Odd story was inspired by the following word prompts:
Today’s things are: Apricot, vase, sock
When Jack’s parents arrived home unexpected they received a bit of a shock.
At first, they thought that burglars had broken in and ransacked the place. Maybe they had kidnapped their teenage son who they’d left behind to look after their house. Perhaps they will receive a ransom note in a few days telling them to put all their savings, in used notes, into a brown envelope.
Then they realised that nothing was actually missing. The Television was lying face down on the living room carpet, but it was still there, not stolen. Other objects of value, although not in a condition the manufacturers would have recommended, were still present.
The contents of the fruit bowl had been thrown around the room. They found a pineapple behind the CD rack, two kiwi fruit squashed behind the dresser and an apricot wedged in the CD player. It appeared that their son had had a party, despite them telling him quite categorically he was not allowed one. They should have sent him away to summer camp rather than allowed him to stay and ‘house-sit’.
As Eileen passed by her large oriental vase she detected an extremely unpleasant aroma wafting from it. Vomit was never a pleasant thing to discover without prior warning, especially when it was inside one of your most prized antiques.
The Kitchen was surprisingly untouched, but then they remembered that their beloved son couldn’t cook so had probably ordered takeaways, which would have accounted for the untouched kitchen and all the marks smeared over their cream wallpaper with the golden fleur-de-lys flock.
On the stairs, they noticed the abandoned remnants of various items of clothing. A pair of trousers hang over the bannisters, a stripey red shirt lay midway on the stairs and over the handle of their own bedroom was a sock.
Just as they got to their bedroom door, their son, Jack opened it. He stood there in a pair of boxers, the straggly growth of an adolescent beard coming through on his chin. He quickly closed the door behind him and exclaimed.
“MUM! DAD! How did you get home from your cruise so quick? Did they teleport you or something?”
Eileen answered Stephen was too angry to speak, judging by the colour of his face and the pulsing blood vessel on his left temple. She hoped this wasn’t going to develop into a full explosion.
“No, there was an epidemic of Norovirus so they flew the few of us that didn’t have it back early. What the hell has happened here? It’s like Armageddon!” She started out calm but ended at a scream.
“Calm down, I was going to tidy up the place, honestly I was. Why don’t you go for a drive and I’ll have the place looking spick and span when you get back.”
Stephen suddenly did his Krakatoa impression and erupted. He shouted and flailed his arms around. Eileen held him back. When he got like this, you couldn’t actually understand much of what he said, but you sure understood the gist of it. When he gradually wound down, like a clockwork toy, Eileen exclaimed to her Son “We’ve been driving for two hours from the airport. We just wanted a nice cup of tea, instead, we have a mess to clear up. We told you, No parties!”
“Erm, This wasn’t a party,” Jack said unconvincingly “It was a study group.”
Stephen shouted, a vestigial remnant of his earlier eruption “What were you studying? Anarchy? You little hooligan. You’re grounded and there’ll be no more allowance until you’ve paid for the cleaning bill.”
“I said I’ll sort out the cleaning.”
Just then, they heard noises coming from their bedroom. Obviously, Jack wasn’t alone.
Pushing Jack out of the way they opened the door. The floor was strewn by various undergarments, several pairs of bras, knickers and several pairs of boxer shorts. Feet stuck from under the bedcovers at all angles. Several pairs of feet, some small and dainty, others larger and hairy.
Eileen gasped in shock.
Stephen turned back to Jack and flippantly said: “I see, you were studying biology!”
Copyright: Kristian Fogarty 30/August/2018