I thought I’d sit down and write you this letter,
I’m bored you see, and there’s nothing better,
I can think of to do to spend my time,
This yoga retreat is far from sublime!
I’m sick of the beach and the waves and the sea,
The nightlife is dull and there’s no variety.
I’ve lost track of the seashells I’ve managed to exhume.
from out of the confines of my swimming costume.
It’s so boring here I’m tempted to jump
into the canal. I’ve really got the hump.
There’s no television to watch, no booze to drink,
All I can do is sit here and think.
And even though I can’t overindulge,
there’s no sign whatever of losing my bulge!
So, Darling, I beg you, In my humble way,
Send me a big bar of Chocolate today.”
And that was the last letter he’d had from his Beryl,
Before she went quite mad and turned rather feral.
So before you spend a fortune on a yoga retreat,
Remember poor Beryl and just watch what you eat.
Copyright: Kristian Fogarty 15/February/2019
This poem was written for the Three Things Challenge, now hosted by Paula of Light Motifs II
The Three things were: Seashells, Yoga and Letter.
I have also included the following word prompts: