Divorce Pending – A Saturday Limerick

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In a diaphanous, silk negligee

The wife stood in the hall doorway,

She demanded some passion

And in imperious fashion

He said “I’ll pencil you in for Thursday”.

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Copyright: Kristian Fogarty 08/December/2018

This contains the following word prompts:


Multiple Word Prompt Story – The Imp at the Spa.

We arrived at the Spa hotel exhausted after our long drive.

Only we would choose a spa break weekend where we had to drive for hours to get there and the first bit through rush hour traffic too.

I had to admit, the spot was idyllic. The hotel was a small Georgian house, with a large conservatory added on. It was set in spacious grounds of green lawns dotted with trees and shrubs amongst which wandered a family of peacocks, the light of the setting sun gleaming on their feathers of blue and green.

In the basement of the hotel was an enormous swimming pool, a steam room and a sauna. The restaurant served that exquisite food that seemed to occupy such little room on the plate but always tasted delicious.

Before we could enjoy the pool or the restaurant, we had to have a cup of tea and recharge our batteries after the long drive.

The room wasn’t very large, but it had a comfortable double bed and the view looked out over the lawns and down to a beautiful lake.

The bathroom was very small, but adequate.

On a tray by the wardrobe was the standard accoutrements that came with an English hotel. A kettle, two cups, a stainless steel teapot, some teabags, UHT milk cartons, instant coffee and some individually wrapped biscuits.

In moments Linda had sorted out the tea while I bumbled around the room. I opened the bedside cabinet drawer and was reassured to find a copy of the Gideon Bible. On the small table by the window was another collection of standard hotel paraphernalia, a writing pad, envelopes and a sewing kit, complete with needle, thread and safety pin.

All these things seemed to bring a sense that all was right with the world after all.

We sipped our tea as we gazed down on the gardens. In the fading light I thought I saw a small Imp like creature, a bit like a garden gnome, dash between the trees.

After feeling refreshed we decided to get our moneys worth and partake of the various relaxing experiences on offer.

It wasn’t until the following day, after several exquisite meals, massages and hours spent languishing in the pool or steam room, that I began to feel my tense muscles relax.

I was lying on a hammock in the garden, in my bathrobe, next to my wife when I heard a strange noise come from a nearby privet hedge. At first I couldn’t fathom what it could be, but then I saw the Imp peer at us though the leaves.

I let out a shout and my wife jumped, knocking over her margarita.

“George, What is it?” she demanded imperiously.

“Nothing, I think I really needed this break. My nerves are gone to pieces. I am going to have a lay down in our room.”

As I got to my room, I looked out of the window and thought I saw the little imp rubbing sun cream on my wife’s back as she lay on the recliner.

I passed out on the bed.

The End

Copyright: Kristian Fogarty 16/September/2018





Today’s things are: safety pin, hotel, bathrobe